Our daughter Lexi plays Field Hockey. It’s her first year, but she’s really taken with the game. And, at the risk of sounding like one of those parents… she’s really, really good.
We stand behind that chain link fence at the field every Saturday morning and I use my singer’s lungs to the best of their ability cheering her on. When she comes off the field it’s high-fives, replays of all of the awesome assists and goals and a car-ride home full of “When you nabbed that ball and took off across the field…” type stories. Her Grandparents come and watch, and they too are into shouting across the field and re-living her glory moments after the game.
As a result, Lexi absolutely loves Field Hockey. She’s very aware that she’s good at it, and she’s begging to play more. Her season ended yesterday and she pestered me incessantly to look into summer camps, indoor field hockey in the fall and how she could continue to play “forever”.
A Notable Difference
Lexi also performed in our studio’s recital a week ago. She played and sang beautifully. Her Grandparents came to watch. But, because it was a recital, in place of exuberant shouting, there was polite applause. Afterward, instead of verbal replays of every amazing moment, people told her “That was beautiful honey.” And what else should they have said? That crescendo in measure 5 was wonderfully executed?…
The comparison between her two activities and the kind of feedback she receives from each made me think.
How can we somehow harness the enthusiasm and feedback that kids get when they play sports and transfer that to piano lessons? So I did a bit of a social experiment on my own child (he he… sorry honey!) and the results were eye-opening!
I based my experiment on the following 4 Sports vs. Piano Lessons observations:
1) We regularly talked about Lexi’s sports accomplishments to other people while she could hear us. While we certainly “talk piano” (a lot!) in our family, we don’t often make specific references when speaking to others about what she was playing and working on at home.
2) Everyone knew how to compliment Lexi on her Field Hockey achievements as the “language of sports” is pretty universal (everyone knows getting a goal is a good thing). Not everyone feels comfortable discussing music; those who call themselves “not musical” don’t know what to say about a musical performance other than “Sounded good!”. This is less meaningful to Lexi than specific references to something she did well.
3) The feedback Lexi received at Field Hockey often happened as she was mid-game… we were shouting encouragement as she was playing. Piano practice is certainly more calm, and family life sometimes continues on around Lexi as she practices.
4) Lexi had the opportunity to gain compliments on her sport every single week. Her piano performances happen less regularly, and therefore the chances for her to gain feedback from others are also limited.
Piano Parents Turned Music Fans
I wanted to see if piano parents could learn to replicate the enthusiasm they display for sports… but in the area of piano lessons. So for an entire week Trevor and I made a point of talking about Lexi’s piano progress to others while she was around, and we were very specific in what we were being enthusiastic about. As she practiced, we made a point of being exuberant about certain things she had accomplished, and we did so in a “sports-fan” like way (“Woah! Do that again that sounded incredible!”). We’d say things like “Remember when you totally nailed that tricky section in The Juggler?” at random times as we went about our day. We encouraged her to play the piano that week for everyone and anyone who stopped by our house and all who was there became involved in her piano practice through fun activities meant to engage family members or make practice enjoyable for kids.
And what happened?
It worked. We definitely observed a significant change in her piano practice habits. She practiced just that little bit longer, with more confidence, and with an awareness of what we had told her she did well. She herself started talking about her piano lessons to her friends and to her Grandparents. She responded with a pleased grin as I cheered her on through her piano practice. We found her several times at the piano outside of her normally scheduled practice time, just playing for her own enjoyment or with a “Check this out Dad!”. She asked me three times yesterday to be sure she was still doing piano lessons in the summer. We were amazed. We were always very supportive piano parents, but now, we’ll never stop being a “Music Fan” of her’s!
What a Simple Fix
If every piano parent could become a “Music Fan” and learn to treat their child’s piano lessons as they would a sport I believe we’d really be hooking into something pretty amazing. Pianists rarely get cheerleading squads, marching bands, screaming fans, bumper stickers… or glory. And why shouldn’t they? Being proficient at the piano takes just as much skill, time and effort as do sports. If we can educate piano parents on the importance of being a true fan to their pianathletes (#newword!) then we’ll all have more invested, motivated and encouraged piano students… and, to me, that’s definitely something to cheer about.
Alice says
Wow! What a concept. Pianathletes. thinking about recitals. We need to provide parents/grandparents with a vocabulary–seems like you had a blog entry about that recently–phrases parents can toss in the kids’ direction when they are practicing.
Deb says
This is such a fascinating thought…and who among us in the teaching profession isn’t “side-lined” by sports? Instead of seeing the sports as combative, thinking of piano “as” a sport in our words, focus and actions will really help our students and therefore our own studios and teaching styles. Thank you so much for sharing this amazing insight.
Susan says
Yes. I’ve been saying and doing this for years. Instead of recitals, we’ve had parties..theme parties. I used to interrupt playing sometimes to encourage the parents to be rowdier with their listening. Always give the child more than one shot…so it’s not do or die. Sometimes we’ve had dinners and the kids just get up and play when they feel like it. You are TOTALLY on the right track!!!
Barbara says
Love this Susan! Encouraging the kids to rowdier with listening…giving more than one shot…afterall if a kid plays basketball they get more than one shot, don’t they! Thanks for this idea.
Susan McGuire says
I’ll wait to hear on this! I definitely get what you say in terms of influence on students. However, it has always made me uncomfortable when I go to jazz concerts and hear applause in the middle of pieces;. wonder what Winton Marsalis has to say on this issue?
Kate says
I’m a jazz musician, and I assure you we absolutely desire applause and shouts of encouragement in the middle of pieces. You should clap after every solo, and don’t feel shy to let loose in the middle of one too. It shows your appreciation of our improvisation and spurs us on!
Joan Reppert says
Andrea, you’re really on to something here. We complain that sports takes precedent over music, and yet who ever thought of cheering a piano student on as we do for kids who play sports? As a piano teacher, I’m a great cheerleader during my students’ lessons but I need to pass this idea along to parents, too. Excellent! Thank you!
Michelle says
I’ve noticed the same thing since we put our son in lacrosse and came to the same conclusion…that he would enjoy piano more if we cheered him on more in practice and in front of others (he’s often said he’s a lacrosse player now not a piano player) and it’s definitely helping boost his enthusiasm. I also wanted to treat piano like a sport because my it’s all my older daughter does and I didn’t want her feeling left out of the praise department. Great concise blog post about it!
Jeannie says
At my studio, we do a Christmas recital where I arrange the students to play @ various churches in the community. Every community has a small church filled with grandparents who love it when children come play. In the spring, we have a pizza party where one of the keyboards is set up. Not only do the kids have to play some little song, but we invite parents up also. I was surprised @ the number of parents who got up and played. It always makes for a great end of the year party/recital.
Kathy G says
This is a great concept, and such a different take on the more typical complaining piano teachers do about how their students’ sports activities take up all their time. Yeah — and I wonder why?! Piano is a solitary instrument for most kids, and practicing on any instrument is a solo deal for the most part. Every other instrument at least gets some kind of recognition and peer activity playing in band, orchestra or choir at school. We pianists need all the extra lovin’ and cheerin’ we can get! So I think you are right on track here.
Part of the problem is the longstanding (200 years or so) of ‘the recital’ and performing as this serious, almost reverent experience where audience must be quiet and still, and the performer is up there in a fancy spotlight aiming for some kind of professional ‘perfection.’
I think this is breaking down, in independent music studios around the country (world?), but it is still sort of the expected norm to have traditional recitals a couple of times a year.
I have done the dinner thing with adult students, gathering around a table for food while one after another student goes in to the piano and plays. I don’t know why it hasn’t occurred to me to set up something similar for the kids.
I am absolutely going to use this whole ‘music fans’ concept in the fall for piano families! And share the ‘pianathletes’ word with my fellow teachers. I have been using the ‘athlete’ analogy, myself, since hearing a presentation through our local MTA on music, the brain and learning. The presenter showed us that learning to play a musical instrument is both an artistic/intellectual activity AND an athletic one.
In fact, when my adult students, especially, struggle with putting hands together, or other physical coordination skills, I point out to them that learning to read music and play an instrument is like learning to speak a whole new language, using a new alphabet, and a new sport, all at the same time.
Thanks so much for this!
Carole Bryan says
Whenever a student and I come to the “sticker moment” on a piece, I send them out into the hallway to get Mom and /or Dad and anyone else who happens to be walking by to listen to our impromptu performance. Always lots of high fives!
alphamuse says
“And what else should they have said? That crescendo in measure 5 was wonderfully executed?… ”
YES! That is what well-trained examiners and judges do – reply specifically and concretely about what the student played, and I believe parents can be trained to do the same!
I have the parents at all my lessons. I have an open studio, where people frequently visit, and a parent is required to attend the lesson, up to the point where the child can drive himself.
Also, I do believe the tradition of listening quietly all through the piece in a performance situation (and sometimes in a lesson) is important. All of us need to learn how to listen better. But when the piece is done, there could certainly be rousing applause, bravas, bravos, etc. And then afterwards very concrete, specific feedback.
I guess what I am saying is that we can integrate many of these ideas very effectively, without giving up some of the wonderful traditions!
Andrea says
Great points alpha muse! – My comment about the crescendo was tongue-in-cheek… it’s rare that those who don’t know anything about music really know how to provide feedback and, in the case of my story, Lexi’s Grandparents do not have any knowledge of what a crescendo is. Part of what my experiment involved was showing (by example) how they could be specific in their compliments. Not everyone knows how to provide feedback like an examiner (and not all kids connect with that kind of feedback either). In the case where parents and Grandparents are actively involved in the lesson process (as they are with your studio) then yes, they likely know exactly what to say. In some instances however they don’t know what so say, so yes I completely agree with you that it is important that we teach everyone the “lingo” of how to be specific in their feedback so it is meaningful to their child. It’s so much easier for everyone to say “Great goal!”… we need to show them what to say to their piano playing kids 🙂
alphamuse says
Yes, that is exactly right. We need to put much more time and effort into training the parents and others who support the student!
Thanks for these great ideas!
Ginny Abbotts says
What a wonderful analogy of comparing the praise and admonitions/recognitions ofsports to music! I personally have what some may consider ” going overboard” to sing my piano students praises, and get their parents to do the same. I think when you think of how much effort, and hard work it takes to learn songs, and accomplish recital pieces, it is sooooo vital to each students success. Thank you Andrea! Awesome!
Donna Lee Wright says
I like to use my bulletin board to point out weekly accomplishments. I’ve used stars, Easter eggs, smiley stars, hearts, anything theme related that month, etc. to write the student’s name on, date, and write something they accomplished either through their practicing or even something learned in class that day. The students love to look for their name and see what I wrote.
Jennifer Foxx says
This post goes perfectly along with your “Shout it Out” handout!
Andrea says
Hi Jennifer – Yes it does! Others can find that post here https://www.teachpianotoday.com/2014/04/28/shout-this-from-the-kitchen-and-help-your-child-practice-better/
This goes even further than being involved with home practice, but really encouraging parents to treat piano kids with as much enthusiasm as we do when they play sports. There really is a big difference there, and I think if we can close that gap we’ll be so far ahead!
Marty says
Oh! I am so grateful for your article. I was afraid I was making an ‘ass’ of myself by being so enthusiastic at the piano and voice recital that I put on for my students. Despite my reticence, it does open up the parents and attendees a bit more and we give rousing applause to all the students… well, still more for those pieces that particularly move us. Thanks again! A great post.
Mary says
Love this idea, I try to be excited about what my students are doing at their lesson. It is harder to get the parents to be as vocal at home. I am going to work on encouraging them to be more enthusiastic. I also direct/teach handbells to children. I am going to make it a point to be more enthusiastic during rehearsals when we start up this.
Gina Wake says
LOVE this!
Thanks so much, will be sharing with Australian piano teachers. 🙂
Marian says
I think there are many venues that would be perfect for piano events like this. I work on ensemble playing, group activities, etc., to foster a more “team” atmosphere in my studio, but I always felt like it was lacking spice and excitement like a sport. In our studio, we really try to make piano & sports work out if at all possible. We are in a formal setting for this upcoming recital, but I will encourage more enthusiasm after performances. (My students might be distracted if there was much going on during their performances!) Thanks!