Disclaimer: I include a fairly even mix of competitive and non-competitive piano games in my lessons. I think that there are benefits and drawbacks of both types. This post is specifically discussing games of a competitive nature.
I love playing piano games with my students. It gives me a chance go kibbitz with them, to reinforce important concepts, to get off the bench and change focus, and to teach a very important life lesson: Sometimes, you will lose.
Teaching Piano Kids To “Lose” Graciously
I first started using piano games in my lessons many years ago. I wanted the games to be a positive experience and I wanted my piano students to love me. And so I would frequently bend the rules, feign ignorance and let them win… almost every single time.
They’d crow with delight in “beating the teacher” and I’d be the gracious loser congratulating them on their “win”.
But then I noticed that, for some, their motivation to play the games had lessened. And I realized that I had (unknowingly) killed the challenge that is the heart of playing games. So I started winning.
Life Lessons in Piano Lessons
For some students this was a serious wake-up call. It was obvious that I was not the only one in their life that was letting them “win” at everything… and it was a new experience for them (one that they didn’t quite know how to handle). But my fears of ruining their desire to play games (or dislike me) were unfounded… they actually begged to play games again and they certainly still liked me. The feeling of having a challenge was re-kindled, and they were desperate to try their best (and their learning skyrocketed as a result).
Did I spend a bit of time teaching certain children how to say “Congratulations” or “Good game!” instead of “Awww! Not fair!” or (my personal favorite) “You cheated!” Yes, I did have to do so. But I considered this to be one more life lesson that my piano lessons had the ability to bestow upon these young kids.
Eliminating Your Unfair Advantage
Now, obviously, as an adult you will have an unfair advantage over your competition; which is why it is necessary to include piano games that incorporate a certain degree of luck (as well as skill). By ensuring luck plays a role, piano students understand that not only do they have a real chance of winning, but more importantly, that if they do lose, luck is partially to blame (and this goes a long way in protecting their self-confidence).
“Be Real” With Kids And Watch Them Blossom
After a few weeks of actual game-play all of my students were both gracious winners AND losers. And this was a great reminder of the careful balance we need to find when it comes to praise… a reminder that piano lessons are a fabulous way to teach children the concept of hard work, of meeting goals, of experiencing personal satisfaction and of building intrinsic motivation. Shying away from these important lessons and “padding” that which is sometimes difficult robs your piano kids of the opportunity to rise to the occasion, to accept challenges, to experience struggle (and the joy of triumph) and to find pleasure in learning for the sake of learning. So, be real with your piano kids (yet still kind). And in doing so, your students will in fact “win”.
Melissa says
What do you do when the game involves answering a question, but the student answers it incorrectly? Say, they identify the wrong note name in “Hoop Laaa” and you have to correct them. I usually give them the points anyway. Do you? Or should we insist on correct answers in order to progress in the game?
Mallory says
If it’s a game in which the correct answer determines whether or not you get a point, or get to advance, then they don’t get points for wrong answers. If it’s a game where the answer simply determines where they’re supposed to move, then I’ll correct their answer.
Emily says
I usually give them 3 attempts to get the note correct. After that, I show them the correct answer, but they don’t get the reward for the correct answer.
Of course, I only get one chance since I have teacher knowledge!
Jeannie says
To my surprise, students knew when ‘I was throwing the game’. They love it the first few times but then they want a fair game. I have several that ‘throw the game’ my way, because they want me to win.
Kids — we learn so many lessons from them!
Jennifer says
One thing I have noticed more and more of is students who have a hard time losing. I usually see this the most when siblings are playing together. They get angry, upset, before the game is even over and want to just quit because they are “behind”. It’s actually ridiculous, really. I don’t let them quit, and hope they learn that the game isn’t about winning, it’s about fun and learning. Who cares who wins? Did they learn something? Did they have fun? Maybe next time they will win. Oh the life experiences we teach. 🙂
Marilyn Brennan says
Thank you.great food for thought!
Lisa says
I was playing Wintervals with a young student yesterday and instead of letting him fix the answer that he got wrong and letting him stay on his space on the board, I said “oh, no!” and moved his marshmallow back to the start. His face lit up and he groaned and then had so much more fun playing the game! It astonished me! But he tried really hard to get the right answers after that.
Karen Van Sickle says
If it is an “answer game” I tell them that I may give a wrong answer and if they catch me then I lose a turn, or draw an extra card, or go back …whatever is appropriate in the game but if they DON’T catch me is get am extra turn! Makes them really pay attention!! I have seldom “let” students win, but I think most of the games I play mostly have some element of chance. Sometimes (and it is true) I will say no one has beaten me in this game this week. Let’s see if you can be the first!!